Thursday of the First Week in Lent, March 13, 2025

Thursday of the First Week in Lent, March 13, 2025

Today’s Readings, from the USCCB:

Reading 1

Esther C:12, 14-16, 23-25

Queen Esther, seized with mortal anguish, had recourse to the LORD. She lay prostrate upon the ground, together with her handmaids, from morning until evening, and said: "God of Abraham, God of Isaac, and God of Jacob, blessed are you. Help me, who am alone and have no help but you, for I am taking my life in my hand. As a child I used to hear from the books of my forefathers that you, O LORD, always free those who are pleasing to you. Now help me, who am alone and have no one but you, O LORD, my God.

"And now, come to help me, an orphan. Put in my mouth persuasive words in the presence of the lion and turn his heart to hatred for our enemy, so that he and those who are in league with him may perish. Save us from the hand of our enemies; turn our mourning into gladness and our sorrows into wholeness."

Responsorial Psalm

Psalm 138:1-2ab, 2cde-3, 7c-8

R. Lord, on the day I called for help, you answered me.

I will give thanks to you, O LORD, with all my heart, for you have heard the words of my mouth; in the presence of the angels I will sing your praise; I will worship at your holy temple and give thanks to your name.

R. Lord, on the day I called for help, you answered me.

Because of your kindness and your truth; for you have made great above all things your name and your promise. When I called, you answered me; you built up strength within me.

R. Lord, on the day I called for help, you answered me.

Your right hand saves me. The LORD will complete what he has done for me; your kindness, O LORD, endures forever; forsake not the work of your hands.

R. Lord, on the day I called for help, you answered me.

Verse Before the Gospel

Psalm 51:12a, 14a

A clean heart create for me, O God; give me back the  joy of your salvation.

Gospel

Matthew 7:7-12

Jesus said to his disciples: "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives; and the one who seeks, finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. Which one of you would hand his son a stone when he asked for a loaf of bread, or a snake when he asked for a fish? If you then, who are wicked, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good things to those who ask him.

"Do to others whatever you would have them do to you. This is the law and the prophets."

 

The Silence Between the Asking and the Answer

"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you." – Matthew 7:7

It’s a beautiful promise.

A hopeful one.

But if I’m being honest, I’ve struggled with this verse.

Because I have asked.

I have sought.

I have knocked.

And there have been times when I felt like nothing happened.

I asked for my mother to be healed. Instead, I watched cancer tear through her body, leaving me helpless.

I asked for my father to have more time, but just seventy days after losing her, his heart gave out too.

I asked for my son to have a win, something to lift him from the weight of being picked on and isolated. But that win never seemed to come.

So what do I do with this verse?

What do I do with the times I called for help, but the answer I needed didn’t come?

The Anguish of Unanswered Prayers

Queen Esther’s story feels raw to me.

"Seized with mortal anguish, she had recourse to the LORD."

I know that feeling.

That moment where you have nothing left but God.

When you’re praying, not with polished words, but from a place so desperate, so empty, that all you can do is throw yourself at His feet and beg.

"Help me, who am alone and have no help but You."

I’ve been there.

I was there in a hospital waiting room, praying for something – anything – that would let me hold onto my parents a little longer.

I was there in the nights I sat awake, drowning in the weight of grief and loneliness, wondering if God had forgotten me.

I was there when I looked at my own reflection, feeling small, feeling like my prayers must not matter as much as everyone else’s.

And yet…

Esther’s story reminds me of something I often forget.

She didn’t just pray – she acted.

She trusted that even if she didn’t know the outcome, even if she felt small, even if she was terrified – God was with her.

And He was.

But What About When God Feels Silent?

The Psalm today says, "Lord, on the day I called for help, You answered me."

But what if I didn’t hear the answer?

What if I was so focused on the miracle I wanted that I missed the one I was given?

Because looking back, maybe God did answer me.

Just not in the way I expected.

I prayed for my mother’s healing – but maybe the answer was in the love that surrounded her in those final days.

I prayed for my father to stay – but maybe the answer was in the fact that he didn’t have to live without her.

I prayed for my son to get a win – but maybe the answer was in how he grew, in how he survived something that made him stronger.

Maybe my prayers were never ignored.

Maybe they were just answered in ways I couldn’t see at the time.

What Do I Do With That Now?

Jesus’ words today tell me not to stop asking, not to stop seeking, not to stop knocking.

 

And maybe that’s the point.

Maybe faith isn’t about always getting the answer I want.

Maybe it’s about trusting that the answer will come – even when I don’t understand it.

Maybe it’s about surrendering my timeline to His.

And maybe it’s about recognizing that sometimes, the biggest act of faith is continuing to pray – even when I feel like I’m praying into the silence.

Because no matter how many times I’ve questioned, no matter how many times I’ve felt forgotten, no matter how many times I’ve wondered if my prayers have been in vain – I’m still here.

Still asking.

Still seeking.

Still knocking.

And maybe that is the real miracle.